How do I become really wealthy when my main skill set is being fun?

I was thinking earlier today about how fun I am.  I’m really…really fun.  And not even in the promiscuous way!*  I’m the best possible date for parties and office obligations, I always have a pun at the ready, I never come empty-handed, I’m nice, my humor is just biting enough that one could never accuse me of being too nice, I’m only braggy in a sort of ironic way, I love having people over and I get along with just about everyone.**  I would totally be friends with me!  I’m so fun!

But that’s kind of it.  2 college degrees and 6 years of work experience later, and “Being fun” is probably the only worthwhile skill that sets me apart.  More than a skill, really: it’s skill SET.  So much is involved with being fun.  Being fun involves such things as “conversing in an interesting manner,” “playing well with others,” “holding my liquor,”* and “thinking of fun ways to spend time,” among many others.  I would say it’s just as much of a skill set as, say, international conflict negotiation – just different.

AND SO MUCH LESS PROFITABLE.

Here’s the deal.  There needs to be an extremely profitable profession for people who – although they may be very smart and totally COULD have learned the “technology or blood” skill sets – skipped over said traditionally “useful” skills (also including “math beyond calculating salestax on my blackberry calculator,” “doctor stuff,” and “the internet”) and majored in communications and being fun instead.  You know: for the good of the people.

I did some research into this, and other than prostitution (again – not fun in the promiscuous way!*), the options are limited.  There is this one website www.rentafriend.com, where, as title suggests, one can pawn their friend services for some cash, but it’s not mansion with a tacky fountain wealth at ALL.  $50/hour, MAYBE, and that’s generally just for people who have those aforementioned traditional profitable skills that they will teach the friends who rented them (“multi-lingual” or “accounting” – yeah like THAT’S fun). 

 

It’s like Craigslist. But way sadder.

 

The only one making any real wealth from this website is creator Scott Rosenbaum (see below).  I’m sorry – there is no WAY that guy is more fun than me.  If someone rented me to be their friend, I would never wear that t-shirt because it’s a.) not that cute and b.) uh hello – I don’t want the friend that is paying for me to look like a loser.  Come on Scott Rosenbaum, you’re making the fun profession look tacky.

Yeah. Totally fun, Scott. Why don't you just put a price tag on your back?

Unfortunately, the only professions where “being fun” brings any sort of real wealth are prostitution adjacent.  These highly sought after professions are listed below:

Trophy Wife
Ex-Trophy Wife
Trophy Husband
Ex-Trophy Husband
Socialite who hosts club nights in Vegas

*Except for college, obv.

** I have a short list of exceptions.  Watch out, list.

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One Response to “How do I become really wealthy when my main skill set is being fun?”

  1. Gretchen Says:

    Initially, my only suggestion was trophy wife. However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that you may be able to get elected president and/or take over the world with those kinds of skills. Just saying…

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